I dream

The first time I heard the question: What is your dream; what do you want to do in life? I was in high school. My school counselor asked me that question. I must admit I didn’t know how to answer it. Looking back, I had never given any real thought to what I wanted to do. I only knew what I didn’t want to do. I didn’t want to work on some white guys farm, making wages that wouldn’t even provide me with enough money to afford a pint of dirt from the farmland he owned or leased to raise his crops. I had not even the minutest amount of desire to drive a tractor or to operate any farm equipment that many young Black boys in Cross county, Arkansas saw learning how to do as some rite of passage. When I was eight years old, my father was killed in a farming accident. As for as my mom was concerned that sealed it for me, no working on a farm, especially driving a tractor. My dad was killed driving a tractor.

When my high school counselor asked me that question, I didn’t realize at the time that what he was asking was a bit different from dreaming. No. I didn’t have a dream. I had many dreams. I don’t remember exactly when, but dreaming has been a big part of my life. I dream of living in a society where nothing negative happens; I dream of living a life where everyone acts right all the time; I dream of Nirvana. I’ve written before about not knowing we were poor until we got a television. The dumb box showed me how people lived in a world that was far different than the one in which I survived each day. The dumb box sparked something in me that still exists today. Something that I’ve never shared with anyone, except you. Dreaming has been a way of life for me. It has provided a safe harbor from the tsunami we all know as life. I dream continually. Some might call these daydreams; however, my dreams encompass all stations on the clock.

I’ve come to realize in my latter years that this dreamstate is more than simply dreaming. I think it might be more appropriate to call it meditation, deep thinking, maybe even living gloriously despite the problems of the world. This mental gymnastics helps me navigate things that often seem non-navigable in the so-called real world. If you think this sounds much like fantasy, you’re right. Furthermore, your judgment doesn’t offend me in the least bit. I can honestly say this personal ability to drift off into a land of experiences I might never find myself has kept me from harms way in a lot of ways. It has presented me with the gift of serenity when a respite from disturbing stuff has been raging unfettered.

At the age of seventy-one, I still dream. I dream of heroes and heroines; of waking up one morning and finding all weapons on the planet mysteriously gone; of being the smartest person on the planet, responsible for scientific inventions that would advance the condition of us all to an immeasurable state.

OOPs, my dog just jumped into my chair and landed between my lower back and the back of the chair. This is one of her favorite spots. She’s not a dream, at least I don’t think so. Dreaming is taking a break for a while.

This is Ari, my dog, She’s not a dream.

I’m old and blessed…hope you will be too.

14 thoughts on “I dream

  1. catterel August 4, 2021 / 8:19 pm

    “You gotta have a dream, if you ain’t gotta dream, how you gonna have your dream come true?”

    Like

  2. JLem August 5, 2021 / 12:13 am

    Great read. Envisions are great. In my opinion. My greatest vision as a kid; and even before the first moon walk, it was going to the moon. In 1969 when those guys jumped around on that planet, I realized it was a possibility for me. But, of course, it never became a reality for me. The only thing left for me now is having a very wealthy friend who would be willing to purchase a ticket for me, to travel into the outer space. Again, great read and thanx for sharing.

    Liked by 2 people

    • BookWorm August 5, 2021 / 2:19 am

      Keep dreaming, might it come true some day!?

      Like

    • oldandblessed August 5, 2021 / 1:47 pm

      I appreciate you taking the time to read this and thanks for the feedback.

      Like

  3. BookWorm August 5, 2021 / 2:18 am

    Now this is such a thoughtful post. Not many have the courage to break the set patterns, be it in any field. I am glad you are one of the view thoughtful people. Ah… dreaming never stops. It does not occur while you sleep, it keeps you from sleeping. These are the words of Abdul Kalam. I am still not sure what to be, what to do when I grow up. I am interested every damned thing. Thanks a lot for motivating me😊

    Liked by 1 person

    • oldandblessed August 5, 2021 / 1:49 pm

      Thanks for the feedback. Compared to a 71-year-old coddger like me, I pray you have many decades of dreaming to come.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. rangewriter August 8, 2021 / 10:42 pm

    Thanks for sharing your most excellent dream world with us. I often wonder how people survive some of the unfair circumstances that they are born into. I can see that dreaming is one valuable technique. I suspect dreaming is what has saved you from utter bitterness and anger. I’m afraid, were the tables turned and I had lived through things you’ve lived through, I don’t think I’d have such a generous spirit.

    As a child I was fearful about the future. I really couldn’t imagine how I could make it on my own. I didn’t understand the work world. My single mother was always home when I was there. That was because of her frugality and her wise ways with the inheritance she received from her businessman father. (White privilege in action.) The long and short of it is, that I didn’t understand how money was made. I didn’t understand how work worked. I was deathly afraid of not being able to support myself. Turns out I was extremely fortunate to fall into a blue collar job that paid really well (at that time) and for which I was uniquely qualified. I still don’t know how I could have survived with a white collar job. I still have no concept for sitting in an office for 40-80 hours a week and producing something worthy of making a living.

    Like

  5. oldandblessed August 9, 2021 / 3:15 am

    Sometimes fate has a way of finding us and plopping us down just where we’re best suited. My middle child has a master’s degree, and she chose to be a police officer. She’s happy with her life. My oldest child worked hard to graduate from college, She now has her own real estate business, and a real estate school to boot. She makes a ton of money. My son, the youngest, worked hard to graduate school. He has worked more jobs in his 11 years since high school than I ever imagined having.

    My dream job in high school was sitting in an office producing something worthy of making a living. I retired from the position of chief human resource officer/associate vice chancellor at the University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences. That was the place to be when I was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma 21 years ago. UAMS has a world renouned Myeloma Institute. Fate would have it.😎

    Like

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